PANDEMICALLY SPEAKING, 5- This happened Last year but feels like yesterday

Looking for a peaceful place to leave the hectic day behind? Seeking quiet and calm? Want to leave chaos in the dust? We’ve got the getaway for you! Go to your favorite bank just after closing. Head towards the drive through. When your car begins to spit and spew, don’t worry. When the spews become projectile engine fluid vomitation, turn off the car and gently coast to the curb, then call AAA. The lovely helper on the phone will assure you a caring service driver and vehicle will arrive in a quick 30. Relax, and enjoy the spring dusk ambiance.

Wave to the Bank employees as they head for home .“Good night friends , thanks for all you do to keep my measly accounts in check. Have a nice night. “
After an hour, Call AAA back and listen to the woman say “Oh my! What in the world? Let me find out about this; hold please” and while you are holding, notice the trees with their new green leaves swaying back-and-forth gently welcoming in another spring evening .Gentle trees, gentle breeze. Lovely.

When you find out it’s going to be another 30 minutes or so don’t be alarmed . As darkness creeps in remind yourself there are no monsters hiding in the bushes that’s just silly and there are no Alfred Hitchcock birds lining the roof edges. No gargoyles ready to pounce, not night Owls perched on the branches eyeing you. That’s just more silly.

Remember, rats don’t come out until it’s just barely dark and you’ve got at least a few minutes before then. What a nice night- it’s not raining -it’s not cold . The next 60 minutes pass by a lot faster than the first two hours. Back Bank Parking lots offer quiet meditative space. And if your fears whisper their way into your consciousness saying things like “You’re alone out here and no one can hear you scream” -remember that there’s no safer place than a back bank parking lot because when it gets dark lights come on from every tree and roofline and innocuous bush. And there are cameras in every nook and crannie watching over you, so rest assured The attack, abduction, murder and mahem will be recorded from every angle -to be shown at a later date on Law and Order. Knowing this, relax, and enjoy the moments of quiet and reflection. Back Bank Parking -bringing memorable moments to a psyche near you.

The rest of the story ... A gianormous Transformer finally arrived and a human climbed down out of it named Andy. He was a volunteer fireman and an EMT and just started this job six months ago. He treated my car, and me, like good neighbors . When I climbed up the ladder to get into his car-truck- biggest- ass- towing- thing I’ve ever seen, I thought his intro share of being an EMT and Fireman could be a line, bait; and he could kill me and no one would ever know but I didn’t see any hidden weapons- axe or knives or guns in the dark monster truck so just to play it safe I clung to the door while we got to my mechanic’s place and he dropped me off as kindly as he had picked me up. Before he had a chance to rum-rum off, I realized that mechanics don’t really see a need for streetlights, maybe, as it was pitch black dark, so I scrambled back into his truck and begged him to take me to the intersection ahead, where from this distance looked a lot brighter and safer. At least someone would likely find my body sooner. He reached the intersection and paused long enough for me to slide out. Thanks, Andy-no, I’m serious. Thanks for showing up, and not murdering me. 

 The intersection was a hopping, busy bar-ry spot. Lots of activity, most of it typical nightlife for the younger, with a few questionable characters hanging out. I called a Lyft. On my phone I followed the mapping of my driver, in a little toy car on a little toy map, and he arrived a LOT quicker than AAA. I took a screenshot of the name and photo of who is supposed to be coming, (also showing up on the phone app), and when he arrived, I announced, “Well here’s the Lyft driver who’s going to take me home- I’m getting in now good night everybody” and I waved good night to all the strangers around me. 

Five minutes later I was home. I had the driver drop me off a parking lot away from where I live and I walked a zigzag pattern to my little home. If the door hadn’t been locked it would have opened up all by itself and welcomed me in but I managed to get the key in the door and get in the house before I collapsed into my chair,thankful oh so thankful to be home.

3 Thanks to years and years of law and order, I wasn’t anxious. I knew that eventually Olivia and her crew would show up and the story would be over without commercial interruption so it was really all good and I enjoyed the opportunity to write again. It felt good to tell a story. By morning , I felt aged and like ancient road kill in motion, as I walked to PT which was a good target and goal. Walking home went better. Everyone needs a little PT quality push and pull now and then; plus I have an incredible Physical Therapist.  

The rest of the rest of the story-

News wasn’t good about carbaby. No car ICU could save it. They patched and plugged, and let me know I needed to be looking for another car, and oh, by the way, that will be $500.  RIP 2001-2019 VW Jetta.

I started looking for no -idea-what, and I did the scary get ready work like going to the bank to understand how car loans worked, and such. That visit helped me feel a little empowered, if you can feel that way going into an area you know nuthin about. If my knitting needles had broken, if my shoulders had been demolished (another tale), if I this  or that, I might have been able to figure out an answer, but cars are just not my forte. So I thought and thought and decided to take a huge leap into a more modern world of autos. Two of my daughters drove priuses. I reached out to some trusted friends who also drove those, and we all started looking. Within a day or 2, a 2012 (Why that’s nearly brand spanking new!) Prius -C popped up not far from home. The friends drove me to look at it, and I asked them to look for red flags, since they were more familiar with hybrid cars. The only thing I knew to look for was a place to put the key. I had decided that I was not ready for ‘keyless’ just not ready. The car was a little bumped up, but looked good. (I’m also a little bumped up and don’t look nearly as good). The price was right, so we made a deal. 

My friend followed me in my temporarily working carbaby, and we made it. The dealer offered me $500 for my car so that evened out the repair costs I had just paid. 

I drove off in a completely new world vehicle. Nearly a year later,I’m still trying to figure out the details. 

I don’t jump out at red lights nearly as often to see if it is leaking anything, and my heart rate doesn’t spike when the engine goes quiet. Live and learn. 

When the time change came around,a few weeks ago, I thought I should, after all this time, try to figure out how to change it on the car clock.  I searched the manual and was able to welcome daylight savings time, but somehow, the speedometer screen went from mph to kmh and for a week or more, I was paranoid about being pulled over  because it looked like I was driving 71 Mph on  my way to work! Sometimes, I’d hit 58 backing out of my parking place at home and driving down the alley to the main street. 

I finally realized the screen was different and I went back to the manual again, to no avail. Youtube eventually came to the rescue, and thanks to a short video with easy directions, I’m driving mph again with friends and neighbors. 

So much to figure out on cars these days.